Our Angel Babies

Some time between the appointment on my birthday and the next morning, our sweet girls passed away.

They were delivered stillborn on June 22nd.

Jilinda LaRene came first at 10:58 and Alayna Julienne was only a half hour behind her because she was breech.

The are absolutely gorgeous, perfect, and pure.

We will miss them terribly, but we know that we will get to see them again and raise them.

We are so grateful for that knowlege given to us and can hardly wait for that joyous day of our reunion.

We know that they are watching over us as our little angels.

Love you, my sweet, beautiful little Jilinda.

Love you my spirited, lovely little Alayna.

"The Lord takes many away, even in infancy, that they may escape the envy of man and the sorrows and evils of this present world; they were too pure, too lovely, to live on earth; therefore, if rightly considered, instead of mourning we have reason to rejoice as they are delivered from evil, and we shall soon have them again." -Joseph Smith Jr.

Sierra's 25th Birthday

Hard to believe I turned 25.

That's a quarter of a century old!

The day began as a pretty normal Monday.

I had a doctor appointment to check on the girls, and got some pretty pictures:

I was tired from driving when I got back home, but made sure to bid a really great friend a "see-ya later" (I don't do well with goodbyes) before she and her sweet family would be leaving the next day.

Me, Jenny Rudolph and her boy Andrew

 We got to go eat at my favorite restaurant, Olive Garden, before heading home for some cake.

Porter wanted to eat the cake more than take a picture.

I was okay with the fact we were out of candles since I was having a hard time breathing anyway.

Then Seth came through the door with this!

Well, it didn't look like this at first--it was in a box, and he put it together.

I hope it's true what they say about never forgetting how to ride a bike!

Father's Day 2011

Happy Father's Day

To Seth...

I couldn't have asked for a better father for my children!

Porter watches you and wants to be just like you.

I love how excited he gets when you walk through the door!

I'm sure our girls are going to adore you just as much as we do.

To my dad...

...who sacrificed and continues to sacrifice everything for his family.

Who loves my mother and all of us kids more than anything, and we know it!

And to Seth's dad...

Thank you for being such a wonderful example of how a father should be to Seth!

I'm glad he has always wanted to be just like you.

Love you all!!

And, to all of the wonderful fathers in our lives...

Happy Father's Day!!

29 Weeks Update

The only new information I got this week was a date.

The date for my c-section.

July 16th

That is 34 weeks 0 days for the girls.

And it seems really close.

I was told to plan on having them in the NICU for 2 weeks.

I have mixed feelings about this.

I'm so large that I'm super uncomfortable, constantly exhausted, and therefore ready to be done being pregnant.

But...

...the girls will be 6 weeks early and that makes me nervous.

Again, I'm SO glad I went to the NICU last week to check things out because I feel a lot more calm about the whole thing than I thought I would, but it still makes me a little nervous for them and for me.

I don't know how I'm going to handle the situation when I will have to leave them there and go home before they can join me.

I'll probably break down and bawl my eyes out.

Even with the knowledge that they're in good hands.

The babies didn't cooperate with the ultrasound, and I don't expect any more awesome pictures since they're running out of room, but I thought I'd share this picture:

That's the membrane that "popped".

Either I make weak membranes or really strong babies.

I think the latter is more likely.

Apparently, my doctors did some research to see if this has happened to anyone else (since they had never heard or seen this happen before) and they found ONE other case in Saudi Arabia that was recorded.

I guess that makes me one in approximately 6 billion.

I feel so special!

Oh, and they did a bunch of blood work to see if they could come up with why I get blood clots when I'm on birth control or pregnant, and they had inconclusive results.

I was told to take more blood tests when I'm not pregnant to find out why when my hormone levels are back to normal.

In all honesty, I don't think the results will be any different, and I don't really care to know the reason why I get the clots so I probably will never take the tests.

The knowledge of the reason wont change the treatment of the problem, so it seems rather pointless.

Visits

We actually had two sets of visitors this last week!

Neither stayed very long and I didn't take my camera out, but we enjoyed their company!!

Our first visitors were the Simons who stayed for a night.

They're old college friends who were going on a coastal trip, and we had a great time chatting and catching up!

Our second visitors were my sister and her husband!

They were celebrating their tenth anniversary at a beach house in Lincoln City for a week.

They came bearing the gift of Tillamook ice cream...YUMmmmm

We got to go out to lunch with them at the Cheesecake Factory before they headed back to Idaho.

While there, the server had a mishap and ended up spilling our plates on my arm...

...it was messy, but I was fine!

I felt more sorry for her because she was so embarrassed.

I smelled a little like pot stickers for the rest of the day, but got a free cheesecake out of it!

Maybe I should get plates spilled on me more.

It was nice to have people come visit us out here in the boonies!!

100 Times

Porter had a Potty Chart...

He got a small sticker for #1 and a big one for #2.

Every 7th time he filled a square he got a piece of candy.

There were 100 squares, and Porter filled them all!!

So, we rewarded him with:

CARS!

He now officially owns a Lightning McQueen.

And we know about how long it takes to go potty 100 times.

28 Weeks Ultrasounds and 29 Week Update

I got to see the girls twice this week due to my multiple appointments, and we got some pretty good pictures this time around!

Best part about this week is that I have no more new and unusal things to report!

So without further ado:

Baby A (who has a white spot on her heart, so they still know who is who)

Baby B

Baby A 2nd ultrasound

Baby B second ultrasound

And, my FAVORITES!

Baby A

Baby B

B holding A's head!

See?

They just wanted to be closer together.

They will be taken at 34 weeks by c-section.

I made sure to visit the NICU at the hospital on Saturday so I could have some idea of how it will be when they are there, and I'm glad I did.

There was a set of twin boys I got to see, and they were taken at about 30 weeks.

They were TEENY!!!

When I saw them and all the wires they were hooked up to, I thought to myself, It's fine if the girls stay inside for five more weeks.

Even if I become so enormous I can't move.

28 Weeks

How to begin...?

Thursday was my doctor appointment.

I took Porter with me.

It began with an ultrasound, like usual, where it was made known that the membrane separating the twins had definitely ruptured making them now "mono-mono" twins.

If you don't know what that means, read my 25th week update.

After the ultrasound, I had a consult with one of my doctors...also like usual.

She informed me that we were now to treat them as what they now are.

As I stated before, mono-mono twins survival rate is very low.

They rarely, if ever, make it as far as 28 weeks.

If they weren't mono-mono to begin with, like mine, and the membrane ruptures, it is usually because of a traumatic event with the mother.

That did not happen with me.

Mine was completely spontaneous, and apparently unheard of.

How do I get so lucky with my pregnancies?

I digress...

Because of the "usual" situation with ruptured membranes, the recommended diagnosis is hospitalization.

I can't do that.

The doctor even told me she was obligated to tell me that, but that it seems a bit extreme in my case.

I asked if there was anything else I could do instead.

There was, but it involved coming in to monitor the babies every day.

It takes 40 minutes to get here in perfect traffic, I stress out almost every time I drive, gas prices are super high, Porter would have to come with me, and that's just as bad as being hospitalized if not worse than with the driving were my thoughts.

Again, I asked if there was something else I could do.

The compromise was to come in twice a week for monitoring and weekly ultrasounds/doctors visits.

That seemed much better.

They are worried about the babies getting tangled, even with how big they are, but they still don't think it will be an issue.

They are obligated to tell me the "best" thing to do.

With this new situation, the doctor also told me they would have to take the babies at 32 to 34 weeks.

So, I will have two sweet little preemies on my hands...

They will give me steroid shots to stimulate and quicken the babies' lung development, so, hopefully, they wont have to be in the NICU for long.

I didn't get any ultrasound pictures this week since they were mostly just looking at the ruptured membrane.

But, here is my quite large self...

...at 28 weeks.

 “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. … All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure it patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable. … It is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire.”

^{-Elder Orson F. Whitney}

Pure Awesomeness

Thank you Seth for the title suggestion.

Seth loves to kayak.

Even that may be an understatement.

He's attempted teaching me how to "roll" so that I could go kayaking with him, but I got pregnant with Porter and didn't get to finish learning.

He's gone, I think, a total of two times since we've been here.

Memorial Day was his second time.

While he was waiting for his ride, Porter got to have some fun.

I believe we may have a future kayaker living with us!

Good news for the Jensen boys ;)

The "Bins"

Have you ever been to the Goodwill "bins"?

I went for the first time last Saturday.

It was a crazy place, but after going I realized why it was so crazy!

I didn't blog about it until now because I wasn't sure if i could get the stain out of one of the items I found, but I DID!

I think I've found a new love.

Here are my thrifty finds:

Going from right to left, top to bottom: Forever 21 dress, Calvin Klein men's shirt, girls dress (with washing instructions in Japanese!), and DC shirt.

I got all those for $2.16.

Yes, you read that right.

And ALL of them are in like new condition!!

Well, except for the Forever 21 dress that had the stain, but like I said, it came out.

I'm definitely going to make this a weekly thing!

Well...maybe a monthly thing until I don't mind standing and searching for a few hours at a time.

The weekly thing may have to wait until my elephant legs go back to normal size.

Love!

Pretty good for a first time and on a Saturday!